My Life Lessons After 12 Months With PCS

On July 31 it’s already a year ago that I hit my head. This year went by so fast… And what a year it was. It’s probably the one that I had my deepest lows, not only with my PCS symptoms but also mentally. Because being sick for over a year and losing your job in the meantime, isn’t easy…

Although it was a year with big lows, I learned so much from it. Both about myself and life in general. Probably more than I would have in a “normal” year. Curious about all my life lessons?

laptop with glasses and notebook

You learn who your real friends are

There is a reason that people say that you only find out who your real friends are when something big happens. Because I’ve noticed this all too well in the past year!

However, it definitely also works the other way. I didn’t expect it from some people, but they were so involved and thoughtful – and I’m incredibly grateful for that. So yes, even though some friendships have been lost, I also have some nice new ones!

You are the main character in your life

You probably recognize it; what is important to you seems to mean little to others. And that is actually quite normal. Because where you deal with all kinds of things, the same applies to someone else. You can therefore not expect that someone finds exactly the same things important, because you may not do the same the other way around.

As a result, they may be less aware of you when making certain choices. This can cause conflicts, because you’re frustrated that they haven’t thought of you, and they don’t understand your reaction.

Once I understood that everyone plays the leading role in their own lives, I was able to let go of these kinds of frustrations much more easily.

Use your voice

This one is a follow-up on the life lesson above “you are the main character in your life”. Now that you know that others won’t think of you first because you’re not the main character in their lives, it’s important that you keep talking to them.

Share it with them if your situation changes, if you need something, or can use their help. Because trust me, they can’t hear you if you don’t speak.

They will appreciate it, as long as you don’t complain about your situation all the time and are also interested in their lives. Because when you talk about how you feel and your needs, it’s more like they have it top of mind – making it easier for them to take it into account.

Ask for help

As I mentioned at the beginning, I had some very deep lows the past year. My lowest point was probably in March, and at that point, I decided I needed help from a therapist. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t do this alone anymore. And yes, I have a very supportive inner circle, but with some things they can’t help.

I think this has been one of the best choices in my life. Because I needed this a lot, and it definitely helped me!

For some people, there is still a taboo on psychologists or other therapists. However, personally, I think it would be good for everyone to talk to a specialist once in a while. It can help you so much!

So if you struggle with something, no matter how big or small, please ask for help. It can be such a relief to talk to someone who doesn’t know you.

Take day by day

Sometimes I had one good day, followed by 5 bad ones. And mentally that was tough! I finally thought it went better, and then without any reason I had to start all over again the next day.

At one point, I became anxious on the good days. Especially when I had more than one in a row. Because how long would it take for me to feel worse again? This held me back on the good days. Until I realized that because of this I only turned the good days into bad days too.

This made me decide to live more day by day. How am I feeling today? Good? Well, then I am going to do something, instead of worrying about tomorrow. Do I feel bad? That is disappointing, but then it will be a very lazy day and I will look again tomorrow.

Enjoy every victory

Before I got sick, I believed that only the big wins mattered. But in the meantime, I celebrate every step forward – no matter how small it may seem to others. This since it’s a very long process, with ups and downs.

By celebrating the smallest steps, I try to focus on the ups and not the downs. Could I bike for only 5 minutes last week and 7 minutes today? Big win!

The importance of self-care

I’ve always been someone who just kept going. My agenda was full and the moment I came to rest was when I was in bed. Or actually, it was only when I was asleep. Until then my mind was constantly on.

And to be honest, I didn’t think I was doing something wrong because I did the things I liked, and thought would give me energy. But during the past year, I definitely felt the power of self-care on your overall health – and I needed it!

With the help of mental health activities, I supported my emotional well-begin and it was a tool to relax my mind, which helped with the amount of headaches I had some days.

Related article: The Power of Self-Care: Prioritize Your Well-Being

My boyfriend is a keeper

I was already sure of our relationship and that we fit well together, but the past year has only confirmed that even more. I could easily write a whole book about how much I appreciate my boyfriend, but I will restrain myself and stick to this point: he was there when I needed him, even when I didn’t always realize it.

So yes, I can look at the past 12 months in a sad way – and believe me, sometimes I do – but mostly I try to take the positive approach. This by looking at all the things it brought me, such as new and stronger friendships, and life lessons.

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5 responses to “My Life Lessons After 12 Months With PCS”
  1. Elvis

    Thanks for sharing your journey! It’s refreshing to read about life’s lessons in such an authentic way. Keep up the great work, and I hope the next year brings even more positivity your way!

  2. Anxiety isn’t the same thing as PCS, but can I say how much asking for help has changed my life since being diagnosed and medicated for it?

    As someone who banks their who pride and personality on being independent, I’ve literally set myself back so many years by simply NOT asking for help.

    Thanks so much for sharing your journey and tips. Really great read!

  3. Tracy McHugh

    I love the line: you are the main character in your life and use your voice. No one is going to speak up for you. Great things to remember! Thanks for the reminder.

  4. Great post!! We at times as an extra in our life not knowing we are the star of it. As protagonists, we ought to prioritize our wants and needs.

  5. Hoping your next year continues to improve.

Author image

Hi there, I am Resy! Here on Femmelution I hope to inspire women to invest in their personal development to become their most empowered selves. In my bi-weekly column I write about my own experiences within this topic, but also about anything else that is on top of my mind lately.